You are You

You are You!

You are you. You are not me. You are not your brother or sister. You are not the celebrity who’s every move you watch. You are not the fastest runner at your club. You are you!

They say confession is good for the soul so here is a confession. I have always wanted to be someone else. For years I struggled being me. At secondary school I was always being compared to my big brother. He was musical, I wasn’t really, he was academic I wasn’t. I could argue and fight though that was my way of saying to teachers I wasn’t him. I remember in the year we had to decide what standard grades (GCSE’s) we wanted to do. I was in Geography and we had to do a project on the San Francisco earth quake. I said I would do the project that would get me the middle grade, possibly if I did really well I may get a grade higher. Well my teacher was having none of it. I can remember what she said ‘Jonathan, Martyn did the top project and you can to!’ despite my best efforts I lost the argument. So what did I do? Well Martyn still had his project so a change of name a bit of a re jig and I handed it in. I got top marks. I was rebelling against being compared to my brother. I wanted to be me but no matter how hard I tried it was never going to happen. I was Bellshaw Junior.

So fast forward to when I was at university (itself a miracle I got in with the A level results I got!) I was still trying to find out who I was. I became a nightclub bouncer working in pubs and clubs around Staffordshire. I fitted in, I was one of the lads I had fun but still I didn’t feel like me. I have continued the journey since then and it is only over the past couple of years that I have accepted that I am me.

There is no point in denying it. I am who I am. I am unique. I am the only person who can do exactly what I do and how I do it.

Part of that journey into accepting myself is learning to accept compliments. You see I believe that there is something inside our minds that will always pick up on the negative comments. This is why I believe that we find it very difficult to genuinely accept nice comments. I have struggled to accept that I am looking good, I am handsome, you are doing well etc (you get my drift). I normally use humour to accept or deflect this, but I have realised that even if someone has an ulterior motive I can still accept a compliment.

You see as I approach my 33rd birthday I am finally accepting that I am me and no one else. There is no point in trying to be someone else because my DNA is mine. We cannot take someone else’s DNA on instead of ours, so please stop trying. Accept the compliments, accept you are you. If you were meant to be someone else you wouldn’t have been born as you. Whatever your ‘you’ is find it.

Keep being who you are. Some of you need to hear what I am saying and start to accept it. There is only one of you in the world. Only one person who is set to achieve what you will achieve. Don’t let anyone tell you differently. Stay true to yourself.






One thought on “You are You”

  1. Thanks again Jonathan, I have NEVER accepted ME, I often have to “Pretend I am someone else”, sometimes, that is the only way I can get through my day,—– but as you say, I AM ME, I must be ME, anyway, I am managing along my journey, have got rid of biscuits, cakes, crisps, and chocolate, and know what !!!, I am doing just fine without them, CHEERS our Jonathan, your encouragement keeps us all on track. Thanks again, for being you,– our amazing strong winning Jonathan


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